I could actually fail this .............

I went training again tonight and I put as much into it as I could, but I am worried about my fitness levels. Shihan said I am okay to grade as long as I can get the power into it and last through the stamina.

Gonna say me a mantra from now until the end of grading.... "I AM SHE-RA PRINCESS OF POWER AND I CAN DO THIS!"

This is actually the first time I've been worried about FAILING a grade ... but, in my defence (I'm defending myself TO myself here! LOL) Shihan would have said to wait until next time around if he didn't think I could do it. He won't ever set us up to fail ... it's just down to me on the day!

Still a genius :-)

Today started off as a bit of a "non day" really ... work this morning was "okay" - got some orders boxed up and sent out, and poured what I could - I just wasn't in a "lets pour candles" mood and I know when I'm in that kind of mood I am best off OUT of the workshop! Those are the days I end up throwing wax over myself or having a silly accident!

Soooo I came home an hour earlier than I should have ... and have been working on the new website. All the changes are still offline, and I'm not uploading anything else now until the site is completely ready! BUT it's all going really well. I've got the photography page done and am working on my website design service page right now.

I NEED some more stuff in my portfolio though ... I have terrific photographs of MY kids ... but I need MORE! Same with the websites too - I've built sites for other people in the past and I have several of my own .... but I need a bigger portfolio!!!

Sooooooooo ......... if anyone reading this (c'mon I know there are a couple of you at LEAST who read this LOL) who would like a free single page website (hosted on my domain or a free site of your choice) to go into my portfolio then email me!! LOL Oh I should add that just incase there are like hundreds / thousands of you reading this then the offer is limited to the first three people! LOL

I really REALLY want to get out with my camera! I am filled with this URGE and DESIRE to just go take pictures of anything and everything right now! I feel so full of inspiration and motivation. It's a good place to be :-)

Ok I've checked in - back to the websites ... that's if the wine don't get me on the floor first!!

I'm getting good at this not procrastinating lark!!

I've had such a fucking good day!! A seriously really good day!

Okay so my brand spanking new accountant turned up at 3pm today for a first initial consultation and I liked him the minute I saw him. He wasn't at all put off by how far behind I am and we talked through exactly what I need to do and get prepared so that he can then get started. I have a list of things to do and things to put together and he's coming back next week for an action plan!

It's far from over and far from sorted, but it's a big weight off my mind.

So anyway back to my bloody good day! As the meeting with the accountant wasn't until last thing in the afternoon, I had enough time to get lots done during the day ... and I had my laptop with me, so I've been doing some bits and pieces to the website etc. I showed Louise at work and she was ooohing and ahhhing over it! She has tons of people who she says would love a photo shoot, a website designed ..... networking really is my friend!!

I just feel really motivated at the moment. It all feels achievable and do-able. I just hope I can pull it all together!!!!!

AND after not going kickboxing since before Christmas ... I stopped procrastinating on that one too! Went training tonight and it was brilliant. My combos were spot on, I did okay in sparring and stamina ... AND talk about perfect timing - it's grading this weekend!!!! Shihan said that if I train on Thursday and my fitness is up to it then I can grade ... so I could be 2nd brown by Sunday ... OMG that means just 1st kyu to go before I reach black belt! AAAAHHHH!!!! Heheheeeeee I really timed that one perfectly!!

The only thing that potentially worries me is my level of fitness and getting through the stamina rounds. It's something like 10 rounds of stamina for 2nd brown. I haven't trained in a while, but I am still fairly active in my job and as long as I pace myself I should be okay!

So yeah ... a fucking good day, a tiring evening that my muscles will hate me for tomorrow ... and now to shower, THEN bath and sleep!

I really AM a creative genius!!!

Okay well there is a VERY good reason why I've not blogged for a couple of days ... I've been working on yet ANOTHER project! Yeah, see I think I found some of that time that I lost last week, and when Dee finds herself with nothing to do ... oh well life gets really really awful for anyone in her path!

Hence ... even though I haven't even finished the updates on the candlemaking website, and I'm still playing around with the format of the forums and moderating that, plus working a LOT as orders are really coming in at the moment, plus the whole domestic goddess bit, plus (ah well you get the idea!) ... I found myself thinking "Hmmmm deestapleton.co.uk .... now THAT sounds like a GREAT idea!"

Within a few minutes the domain was registered, and by the time it had the 24 hours to propagate throughout the Internet, I'd designed the main page and got the format for the sub pages done! So uhuhuh I've been a very busy bunny!!

www.deestapleton.co.uk - it's there and it's live but very MUCH under construction so I haven't "officially" launched it yet ... I just wanted to share it with the 2 or 3 of you that may actually read my daily mutterings and rambles!! HAHA!

It's going to be a site to house information about ALL that I do and I'll have all my sites linking to each other anyway, so hopefully if someone gets in touch for a candle order, they'll see I do photography, handmade cards, scrapbooking --- plus all the other things I do ... and they might want to commission me for something else!

Dee is gonna make money this year! I am going to HAVE that shop this year even if I have to work all the hours under the sun to achieve it!!!!

If it doesn't move ... tidy it up!

Seeing as I took the day "off" yesterday with Nathan at home for "Insect Day", I spent most of the day in the workshop today. I'm pretty pleased with my progress too ...

A huge part of what I have been doing has been about sorting out and re-arranging the stock room so that I can easily see at a glance exactly what stock I have got. I keep my votive stock in these nifty baskets and there's around 18 in each basket so that when I get orders that are "1 of this, 2 of that" for votives, all I need to do is go into the stock room and they are all there laid out ready. It also means that when customers come to pick up orders, they can browse and buy more stuff while they are there!! I have been trying to work on getting every single fragrance that I have into votives and ready on display in the stock room. I have over 100 scents so it's not an easy task!!

This is what WILL eventually be my new office and what USED to be the "rubbish room!" It has turned out a bit more complicated than planned to get my old antiquated office PC wireless so I need to either buy some really long cables or buy a new PC! LOL Both can wait - it's not essential for now, and in the meantime this is my chill-out room where I can actually sit down and take a proper break!!! This room is opposite the stock room so it will be perfect to take customers into the stock room, then sit down in my office while I prepare their invoices!!

And that's how I spent my day today!!!

Friday Five - 25th January 2008

It's been a while since I answered the friday five! If anyone is interested they come from http://www.friday5.org This week it's all about lateness!

What was the last important thing you were late for? I am actually VERY rarely late. Lateness is a big pet peeve of mine and it irritates me when other people are late ... hence I always try to be early!

What was the last important thing you were late with? Ah, see this is a different question. I am sometimes late with customer orders and have to admit that! I work as quickly as I can, but am only one person and can only do so much! LOL

What (or who!) is the most frequent cause of your lateness? There just isn't enough hours in the day ... seriously! I often settle down in the evening for bed and know that I haven't ticked everything off of my to do list for that day! I swear somebody sneaks up behind me and steals hours out of my day!

Which of your close friends or relatives can you expect almost always to be inconveniently late? My mother! I love her dearly I really do but she is KNOWN for being late! It's to a point that if I need her somewhere at 2.30pm I'd tell her to be there by 2.15 because she'd have a hope of being there by then!!

What’s most likely to cause you to stay up too late before bed? Simply not having got everything done! I'm always working on something whether it's website, catalogue, promotions .... there's always something on the go, and when I take a break from that I've got the new forums that are taking up a fair bit of my time, plus I spend waaay too much time on Facebook and eBay! I'm either in bed ridiculously early like 9pm because I'm shattered from the day ... or I'm up till stupid o'clock in the morning!!

A week hardly worthy of note!!!

LOL well it's true! It's been pretty much a "non week" really. I was a bit unwell at the start of this week .... not "ill" - just wasn't feeling right and had a few cold type symptoms that had me feeling under the weather. I guess it made me just kinda un-motivated and a bit crappy really! LOL

Orders at work have been slow but still coming in at the moment, and considering a recent stock market crash in the USA and talk of recession very much over the news ... I'm still fairly confident that things are going okay!

I have organised a new accountant as well. They are coming in on Tuesday next week to look things over and hopefully I can just hand over my boxes of paperwork and they will get me all nicely up to date!! That will actually then be the LAST thing off of my worry list when the tax man is off my back!

Talking of my worry list -- I have noticed that some of my stress symptoms are coming back again ... the "bubbling" in the pit of my stomach and the way it starts to rush all the way throughout my body. I CAN control it though, and I'm sure that's down to my happy pills! As soon as I feel it start, I am aware of it and I can control it until it reduces and fades away. This is a very good thing!

Today (Friday) is an inset day at school - Nathan made me laugh hysterically when he called it "insect day!" LOL .... visions of creepy crawlies and bugs! We did agree that it should forever more be called insect day though! LOL

I've taken the day off work as hub is in London and the kids are off school with "insect day" .... soooo I am in the middle of a mass house clean - Dee always feels better when she lives in a shiny sparkly world! :-)

pregnant women should cut down on coffee??

Not that it affects ME as I'm highly unlikely to have any more babies LOL ... but it was on the news this morning that a new study has shown drinking more than 2 cups of coffee while pregnant gives expectant mothers a much bigger risk of miscarriage.

I think it's utter madness! I should add that it was only a relatively small sample, but I still think it's crazy. They didn't even mention that there is caffeine in tea as well!

Talk about instilling fear into people - especially first time mums. I've lost two pregnancies to miscarriage but at the end of the day you CANNOT cover yourself in bubble wrap for 9 months (although I'd actually like to try wrapping myself in bubble wrap for a laugh! Anyway I digress....) If you try to avoid everything that you "shouldn't have" and take all the vitamins in the world, you can still have a miscarriage.

It isn't only that ... it's .... well picture a pregnant woman who has had her 2 cup limit of coffee. She's had a really bad day and needs a drink of something! The vodka is calling her but she opts for a cup of coffee instead. What if a few days later that woman miscarries due to something completely unrelated? She'd blame herself and that cup of coffee for the rest of her life.

Ok got that off my chest now!!

The 7 Menopausal Dwarves ... yes really!

Hahahahaaaaaa OHHHHHH This is funny ....

And on the 7th day she did rest!

I was going to go into the workshop for a bit today but instead I spent the day working on the wholesale website. It's soooooooo almost finished! I have literally just one more page to attack with the revamped look and then I can upload it.... trouble is I left the worst one till last! It's the custom option page so it involves writing code for every product and every fragrance grrrr it'll take me some time, but I should get it done tonight if I crack on with it!!

So technically I've been sat on my ass all day ... but I've been beavering away and working!!!!

And she procrastinates no more!!!

Oh it's been a bloody good Saturday! In fact, it's been a damn good week all round!!! Quick run down on the last few days I didn't blog ....

Thursday evening I went over to my mate Lisa's for a girlie chit chat over a couple bottles of wine... Lisa and I have known each other years and we know most of each other's deep dark secrets! We had a great night picking to pieces the men in our lives and generally plotting to take over the world *grin* like ya do .... LOL Got home pretty late - damned good night though!

Friday morning I did another dump run at work to get rid of the rubbish I cleared out of what will be my new office - it's looking soooo much better, but I reckon I've still got around 3 more trips to the dump to go yet :-( Ah well - at least I'm getting there!!! Then all I need is the wi-fi sorted and I can move my PC into there too - wooohooo!!

Nathan proudly showed me a HEAD TEACHER'S AWARD when he got out of school on Friday!!! Not just a merit from the teacher - but a headteacher's award. A handful of these are given every week to students but they are hard to get! Nathan said it was for work that he did, but until I speak to the head to confirm it, I will assume it's also for a general improvement in his overall behaviour recently too. He really has come on in leaps and bounds recently - and the head had commented on that when we spoke a week or so ago. Whatever it was for - I'm very proud of him! Of both of them :-) Megan is just generally well behaved anyway! LOL

Anyway after school on Friday Megan went off to play at Zara's house, and Nathan had his friend Oliver over here. It was only the 2nd or 3rd time that he's had someone over to play because of his behaviour problems, but he'd been really excited about this and apparently Oliver had too. They played really nicely together and it's always really good for me to spend time with other boys Nathan's age because it reassures me that some things are just "small boy" things and not just Nathan! LOL

Oliver was picked up at 6.30... and at 7.30, Adele brought Megan back home ... Megan and Zara disappeared into her room and I basically handed Adele a wine glass! LOL She and I ended up sitting chatting and smoking while the girls played ... and was around 11pm she went home!!!

Today ... well I didn't stir until 10am!! 10am?!?!?!! Crikey it's been a long time since I slept in that late! The kids were quiet in their rooms and Dee slept in!! When I got up - sorted breakfast for the minions, had a leisurely shower and I've pretty much had my backside planted on the sofa with my laptop for the rest of the day!!

I've almost completed the updates to the face lift on the wholesale site. I'm going to leave it for the evening now and finish off tomorrow with a view to having it uploaded by tomorrow night!

I've spent a fair amount of time on my new candlemaking forums too - it all seems to be going really well! 263 members currently and I only launched it a few days ago!! As soon as I finish the trade site I need to work on the candlemaking site!

It's never ending LOL but I love it!!

New projects and a new forum!

I’ve been working on a new forum for candlemakers – a web based forum to almost replace the email group that I have run since oooh around 2000-2001!

I’ve been working on it for a few days sorting out all the admin, creating the categories and sub forums etc, then I launched it last night on my candlemaking email group. By the time I’d sent the email, made a coffee and refreshed the forum main page, people had already started joining!! When I woke up this morning and checked, there were 165 members … that is just in twelve hours!!! I anticipate this is going to be huge!!

http://candlemaking.hyperboards.com/

DeeLights Candles is on Facebook!

Gawd what a damned fine idea this one was!! I was just idly tapping away on my laptop between working on the website and “facebooking” and I just happened to be in the “groups” section doing a search for ‘candles’ just to see what was about, and I noticed quite a few corporate candle companies had their own groups … so I created my own group too! LOL

Basically I’ll treat it just like I do with my customer email newsletter and offer extra discounts to members of the facebook group and keep it updated with new products and info about what is going on!

The BEST kettle in the world!!!!

Okay it sounds silly I know, but I REALLY got excited over this kettle!!!!!

It was a complete catastrophe when I got into work the other day!! As soon as I walk in to the workshop I switch the kettle on, hang my coat up, dump my bags and then go switch the wax on and fire things up. By the time I’ve done all that, the kettle has usually boiled.

Errrr water still cold – kettle still switched on!!!! Kettle deader than a big dead thing! I’d bought it years ago from Wizard (discount shop) for a fiver and it had lasted years … but then it sadly died a death!! Dee without a ton of coffee in the morning is like Britney Spears acting her age rather than her shoe size … it just never happens!

Sooooo I had no choice – HAD to go into town! Co-op was closest and I knew they would have something … but the only one they had was £17.99. I hadn’t wanted to pay that much considering how cheap my last one was … but I figured it was either that or go trudging around town looking and probably only save a few quid but waste time!

So I bought it … and it wasn’t until I plugged it in and switched it on that I realised ….

THIS IS THE BEST KETTLE IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!

Making a kettle sound exciting is a pretty tall order –or so you’d think! I mean, it’s just a kettle …. A means to an end to get a cuppa, right? Wrong! The Breville Lightning Kettle is like a fairground ride! It is not only a very cool stainless steel colour, but it has cool LED lights and eerie glowing colours through the spout! When it’s just sat on its base in standby, it glows LED blue … then when you switch it on, it glows LED red! Seriously it’s so exciting!! Ohhh and it boils water too!!!! It has a big window either side so you can see the glow and watch the water boil (it looks so cool in the dark!)

It didn’t say any of this on the box!! If the box had pictures of a shiny kettle with changing LED lights I would have bought it without any hesitation!!!! It boils MEGA fast too!!!

People laugh at me for getting excited over a kettle … then they SEE it and want one too!!!

Where do all the hours go?????????

You know those times when you look at the clock and think "ahhh fabulous, I have five minutes to myself ...." Then, before you know it, an hour has passed! WHAT HAPPENED to those other fifty five minutes? Where did they go? It only felt like five!!

I've had two full on days like that so far this week and ooops it's only Tuesday!

When I got into work on Monday, I looked through the door at what has affectionately been termed (by me!) as "the rubbish room" and decided that enough is enough ... time to actually get off my arse and get rid of it all!! It's my fault - I haven't stayed on top of it and instead of doing a dump run once every couple of weeks and clearing out ALL the rubbish ... nooo, Dee decided to stash it all in an unused room and worry about it "eventually."

Well - yesterday was eventually!! I wish I'd taken a "before" pic because it's not a huge room - but easily a single bedroom size and it was FULL and I mean FULL of rubbish to the point you couldn't even get in the door, and it was piled up too.

I did three dump runs yesterday and another two today - I am absolutely knucking fackered but I feel really smug and chuffed with myself for it! I cleared the room out completely and I've sorted the rest of the bags/boxes of crap outside the door into what I think should be another 3-4 dump runs. There is some stuff that's simply too heavy for me to move so I need to plead girl on that and get a couple strong men up there to help with those bits!! Any offers? LOL

I'm going to turn the room into my office!!! My desk is currently just in the main packing area and it's a nightmare where it is. If I move into that room I'll be closer to the stock room and it means that when customers come in to the workshop, the office and stock room are almost opposite each other and no need for them to go up the other end where it's messy!!

I moved the sofa in there today and have got a desk ready to move the PC over, but before I can do that I need more help! Gawd I hate being a girl sometimes! I am definitely computer savvy, but when it comes to moving my PC away from the phone line ... I know I'm going to need help with sorting out turning it wireless before I can officially move in there! Thankfully DH has said he'll help me with that! Phew!

I want my office to be more of a comfy and warm place to be when I have paperwork to do! The other downside of where my desk currently is ... is that there are absolutely no radiators up that end because of false walls ... so it's Brrrrrrr cold when the temperature outside drops!!! I want to be able to take proper breaks and have somewhere comfortable to sit and also somewhere for my choccie biccies to live that isn't too far from the kettle! Hehehe

So yeah today and yesterday I have been doing hard manual graft! Up and down those sodding stairs with heavy bags, lifting & shifting furniture and now I is knackered! By the time I've looked at the clock both days ... it's been pretty much time to run and go pick the kids up!

All work and no play makes Dee a very dull girl!!!

I'm going to have me a nice bath and hit the sack early!

what a difference a few days make!!

Well after being all depressed and melancholy I have had a blinding couple of days!! It's been a weird week really and I put it all down to New Years Day being on a Tuesday!!! The week is all ass about face!

It's been a good week though and the last couple of days in particular have been really great. Yesterday was a motivating day at work, and then today everything just fell into place without any planning!!

Put it this way - I have a very big grin on my face!! It's been a really good day!

Been thinking more and more about a shop again. I need to really pull it out of my arse this year and get it sorted - and SOON! I need a good amount of cash to buy some wax in bulk and get started on serious stock preparation and try to build up some reserve cash in the account... as well as promoting and trying to gain new business and staying on top of the website!!

The good news is .... (you mean there IS some?)

Well it's 11.30pm, I'm more than a little drunk and melancholy so I am looking for silver linings in all of the big black clouds that are my life!!!

• When I went into work yesterday there were no emails or voicemail messages to say that anything hadn't arrived, so I HAVE to assume that Christmas 2007 was a success!!
• Nathan's room was "Dee Cleaned" today and is now prolly the cleanest room in the house!!
• I'm pretty drunk.

Yeah ummm that's about it.

2008 HAS to be a good year ... it HAS to.

If I buy new shoes on eBay .....

it won't actually make me feel any better! Doesn't stop me looking though! It's 10.24pm and I am not drunk enough yet.

Resolutions?? Nope, not me!!

I never make New Years Resolutions. EVER.

I am a firm believer that if there is something you need to change about yourself then you need to just DO IT instead of waiting for a date on the calendar. What's the point of overeating at Christmas and promising yourself you will diet/join a gym in the new year?

Sooo many people use today - 1st January as an excuse to give up things like smoking and drinking .... but as the bumper sticker on the back of my car says "I gave up smoking, drinking and sex - it was the worst 15 mins of my life!" Nope, I don't actually have ANYTHING that I want to give up for the new year!

There are changes I want to make in my life for sure, but these have been on-going changes that I have been working on for a while - things like trying to be less stressed (not working when I've fallen out with someone I am close to) and eating better (again not working when I have no appetite due to stress!) but I didn't suddenly wait until new year to make the changes! Funnily enough I did feel nauseous today and it was when I was getting myself wound up about the person I'd fallen out with. More proof that the throwing up was due to stress!!

2008 HAS to be a better year. It has to - or I quit!!!

Not such a happy new year

I can't believe my first post of 2008 is such a depressing one!

I can't go into detail as it would create more hassle than it's worth ... but I have been extremely upset by somebody I am close to. It happened on Boxing Day and I am still waiting for this person to apologise to me. It's New Years Day today and I had really hoped that I would get a call or text message to apologise and clear the air - but nothing.

As I said, I can't go into detail with the who or what, but what I can say is that I have been really upset by this person.

Thing is, it's not the first time that this person and I have fallen out, and in the past where I have been half responsible for the fallout, I am usually the one to get in touch and say "hey, you know what, let's not spoil our friendship and lets just move past this - agree to disagree" ...

Not this time. The last text I sent a few days ago said that I was ready to listen when they were ready to apologise and I have still heard nothing. I'd been hoping that the new year could be a fresh start.

More fool me. Saddens me really.