If things don't change they stay the same!

I've had a manic couple of days so not much time to blog, but here's a very quick update and rundown!!

Dairy-Free - I'll admit I've "cheated" since I started this 3 weeks ago because there have been times where it's been absolutely impossible to avoid dairy products! There have also been times where I've caved and had a pizza or nachos (smothered in cheese!) but what that has done is shown that I DO tend to be MORE nauseous and throw up on days where I have eaten dairy, and especially cheese .... soooo I do think I have a dairy "intolerance" but it won't stop me from eating it - it's just more of an awareness. Yesterday was a totally dairy free day and I am absolutely fine this morning!

Stress Levels - I can happily report that they are lower! It's probably a combination of everything that I am doing at the moment plus the pills, but whatever it is, it seems to be working. I am also trying very hard to change my way of thinking so that instead of approaching something with a negative attitude, I am slapping myself upside the head and trying to be positive.

Weight - I haven't been "trying" to lose weight and haven't been on any diets (aside from the crappy dairy free thing recently), but it's just been a very welcome side effect from stress and I have lost almost two stone in the last year or so. I actually weigh less now than I have done in a long time, and for the first time in a long time, I can look in the mirror and actually not be completely repelled by what I see. I'm not even sure that it's just down to the weight loss .... I think my self esteem is finally building - slowly but surely! I feel positive and happy with my figure, knowing that I actually really do look good, and that makes me feel better.

Procrastinating less ......

I didn’t get a chance to journal an entry yesterday as I was in quite a productive mood and I just got on with things for work!! Hub was working from home so he was able to watch the kids (half term) which meant I got a ton of candles poured and had time to tidy up the packing area!! In an attempt to procrastinate less and thereby reduce my stress, I made a BIG list of everything I need to do and I have actually worked my way through most of it!

I definitely find that making lists really works for me. I have a small notebook that I keep in my bag so I don’t have to worry about forgetting anything, and this major to do list actually spanned three pages! It was a little daunting looking at it to begin with, but once I started working through it and crossing things off, it became really satisfying!!!

Still on my to do list … stupidly I hadn’t even STARTED my Christmas catalogue for candle parties and I have my next one booked in just over a week! Needless to say that was my main mission last night and if I keep at it for the rest of the day and work on it after dinner, I SHOULD have it finished to print off by tomorrow. I still need to do a mass stock take at work and order in extra Christmas fragrance oils, plus re-vamp the website main page, decide what special offers to run in November and send out an e-newsletter! Oh and I need to do more trips to the dump to clear out the rubbish from the workshop!

So yes, I still have a lot to do but I am working on it instead of procrastinating about it – this is a good thing … and I am trying not to stress over it!!

Oh on the downside I was sick this morning. I'm not sure what that means but I'm sticking with the dairy free for the next couple of weeks and we'll see what happens.

No CHOCOLATE and no CHEESE?

I am officially a “Dairy Free Zone!” I had an appointment with the doctor today and she seems to agree with me that my throwing up could possibly be a food intolerance (dairy/lactose) as all of the other tests have been normal so far.

I also had nachos last night - lots and lots of cheese and I even remember thinking "let's see if I'm sick in the morning!" As soon as my eyes were open today I was retching. Not good. It WOULD explain why I don't feel sick every day too - some days I am totally fine, other days I am a little nauseous, sometimes I'm sick and then sometimes it's pretty violent full on up chuck. Sorry for the description!!!!

Soooo, for 2 weeks I need to avoid all dairy products completely to see if it makes a difference. IF I don’t feel sick over the next couple of weeks then I can gradually re-introduce dairy products and see what my reaction is to it the next day. This way I can work out my tolerance levels. If it IS dairy intolerance then I will probably still be okay with the odd bit of dairy as long as I try to avoid anything heavily cheesy or have to bear in mind that the following day I’ll be feeling sick. So for the next 2 weeks this girl is a vegan!

... who loves CHOCOLATE and can't eat any for two weeks!!

Meanwhile I am also being referred to a gastric specialist just to check out that my inside bits are all working as they should, so with that and the no more dairy we’ll see! Admittedly I finished off my Green & Blacks organic chocolate as soon as I got home from the doctor because there was no way THAT was being wasted, but that marked the start of the official “Dairy Free Zone.”

I’ve been a vegetarian since I was 12 years old – that’s twenty years but I had NEVER planned on being vegan!

If I am still being sick with the dairy free diet and the gastric stuff is normal, then the only explanation is that it is a very real physical manifestation of stress. I’m going to make a real concentrated effort to try to eliminate as many of my stressors as I can, and find ways to live with those that are unavoidable. Stress reduction - even just by a little can only be a good thing!! I’ll post about it here as I go as it will be an interesting journey.

No more ....

Chocolate
Cheese
Chocolate
Butter/spreads
Milk/Cream
Chocolate
Yoghurt
Chocolate
Chocolate
Ice cream
Chocolate Ice Cream

Did I also mention that I can't have any chocolate for TWO WEEKS?

What if the Wispa project collapses and Cadburys stop making them because I'm not buying up my fair share of the 23 million bars that are out there over the next 2 weeks? You guys had better go buy them on my behalf!

I did have a glass of wine and a smoke in a candlelit bubble bath tonight with the spa jets going ... relaxation attempt #1!!