Do I need to make more adjustments?

A commenter on my blog suggested that perhaps I need to learn how to make adjustments with my family so that I didn't find myself so stressed and burned out. I have to say ... it's always easy to make suggestions from the outside, and anyone looking in would see it as an obvious thing, but life just isn't that simple!

I have already adapted and made a LOT of changes to my life to fit a good work / life balance ... and truthfully yes, the life half HAS been slipping lately as I have been focussed on work, but I still make sure that I spend quality time with the children every day and that's what it is all about - in my opinion anyway!

I AM working a lot of hours at the moment, and during the school summer holidays it will be worse because I'll have the children during the day and ONLY be able to work evenings and weekends (aside from Wednesdays at the market), but I'm also doing this for them! They want to have nice things, they want the latest this and that - and because they ARE good kids (most of the time!!) I'd love to be able to treat them and reward them more often.

Yes I know, it's not about money and materialistic posessions - it's about growing up in a safe and loved environment ... but c'mon, when all your friends have really cool clothes and you are wearing school trousers that are too short and tops that don't fit you anymore - then the materialistic stuff DOES matter.

I've felt ashamed and embarrassed some days when I've sent the kids off to school because their uniforms have needed replacing for so long and there just hasn't been the money for it. Both of them have so few clothes in their wardrobes that fit properly and let's not get started on the shoes that are falling to pieces!!

THIS is why I do it. This is why I work hard! It's so I can turn around a flagging business, bring it right up to exactly where it needs to be and for my kids to have the benefit of it!!

Market Day!!

The sun was shining - it was a lovely day and I covered costs and made some profit! Even getting up at 5am wasn't so bad today.

I have so many ideas for stall display! Last week was utter shite because of the weather so it didn't really count ... really this week is counted as my first week, so all things considered I did okay ... Next week will be even better! Last week I had two pasting tables that pretty much fell to pieces - this week I had my proper stock shelves and it looked so much better, but still so much room for improvement!!

Ohh here's a pic of the votives! with their new labels! See, I remembered and I got the pic sorted eventually!!!

Ohhh and because it was outside and the sun was shining ... I got a nice tan too!

All missions achieved!

God I love it when I can get to the end of a day and think yeah - I achieved all of my missions today! I have made a lot of stock votives & packaged most of them ready for East Preston on Wednesday ... and all of the orders that came in over the weekend have been poured / packed & boxed!

It's all good!!

I have an appointment with a solicitor tomorrow to get legal advice on a "business" issue that I have. I don't want to go into too much detail in a public post, except to say I am being charged quite a large amount of money for a service that I have not received. There has been some back and forth discussion between myself and the other party via email, but before I reply - I need legal advice. This is an amount of over £500 that I am being charged per quarter ... and if it isn't illegal to charge someone for this, then it should be! I spoke to a solicitor over the phone today and it's a free initial consultation ... so I'll get the advice I need ... reply to their email and if I don't get the response I expect (ie they will deduct the amount I am disputing) then the solicitor will send a letter and war will begin!!

Anyway that's about all I can say in public on the subject!

My priorities right now??

** Sort out this £500 bill - either through my own battle or a legal one!
** Keep working on the accounts (getting through it a bit every day)
** Make a butt load of money!

Simple eh!

The best Friday the 13th EVER!!!!

OMG it turned out to be such a wicked day in the end!! I had a meeting with my bank manager this morning and it went very well. The whole purpose of the meeting was an annual business review, but we talked about my cash flow problems and ways to resolve them ... and she waived my bank charges for this month and also increased my overdraft for a month to cover all of the direct debits due to go out. This means that during the period that the website has been down and I have zero coming in from WorldPay (which is paid to me 28 days after processing) ... I don't have to worry about the bank outgoings. That's a huge relief.

She offered me a business credit card - and I said no! I was proud of myself!! I was sitting there thinking hmmm it would be a nice easy way out RIGHT NOW - I could order a load of fragrances and a butt load of wax, but it wouldn't help in a months time when the payment was due in full!! Sooo instead I'll be getting a debit card which will help enormously and save me having to give my mum cash and borrow her card!!

THEN .... completely out of the blue this afternoon ... my wonderful friend L lent me the money to get the website back online AND pay the set up fee for NetBanx so that the cash flow issue won't BE an issue as NetBanx clear the funds to my account within 7 days instead of 28! NetBanx will take a couple of weeks to set up, but it means that when I hit the period where I have naff all coming in from WorldPay ... it will only be a week until the NetBanx payments come in and I can suffer through a week!!

It's just been such an amazing day, and to think, this morning I was ready to vent! Sitting here right now I can't even remember what I was going to vent about! Hehehee Ahhh it's just nice to have a smile on my face and feel positive! Where would I be without my close friends!

Part of what has been so amazing is L's complete and utter belief in me. It means a lot to know that there is someone outside of my immediate family who cares enough about me and believes enough in me, my products and my potential to achieve more in the future ... to hand over a wad of cash to help me out!! That shows a lot of trust and it means a lot.

Lovin' Monday!

Wow, what a fab day I've had! I was up early to go to the gym as hub was working from home, so to start the day off with a boost was a good start!

The website is now back in my name and registered with my new host - I need to come up with the funds for the hosting to get it officially back online ... but it's all going according to plan so far!

I did some number crunching today with L and worked out that I can save around £4,500 a year purely by buying my wax in larger quantities, changing payment processors and questioning some of my maintenance bills. That's crazy. Scary crazy!!!

Also ... finally the website re-design is coming together. I'm really happy with how it's working out and it'll mean that by the time the site is back online, there will be a whole terrific new look for it!!!

Ooooooooooops sorry!

Well damnit I've been busy!!

After a few days of paperwork filing I had to totally concentrate on stock for the show.... which meant this weekend was totally out as far as blogging goes!

So the show? Well, it wasn't exactly brilliant the first day (yesterday) but today (bank holiday monday) I did a bit better and ended up overall only £50 down on my target for the weekend, so not so bad in the end!! I did take a few pics, it's just late and I can't be bothered to download them - so sue me LOL! (ok that was a joke incase anyone was wondering!!)

Megan was terrific this weekend at the show - a true dynamic selling force! I swear most of the sales were probably down to her and the "balls" that she has when she interacts with customers!

Anyway, it's late ... I'm okay ... and knackered!!!

Mundane Wednesday stuff!

I was chatting to a friend a few days ago about my seedlings and she was all enthusiastic, saying she'd seen the pics on my blog and said how much they had grown!! I was a bit taken aback because I hadn't really thought that people actually read my blog! LOL

I don't exactly write about news, politics, finance or current issues (other than anything that really strikes me and I remember to write about it!!) ... I guess I always thought that my life --- is --- pretty boring! LOL I just write about my daily mundane ... well ... stuff!!

Why blog then? Some would say that blogging is narcissistic, and a waste of time... (and they are probably right!) Why do I blog though? To be truthful I've always kept a journal anyway ... I'm such a forgetful klutz and it's a really good thing to be able to look back and think ohhh yeah I did such and such on that day! I always wrote my journal by hand before until I realised I was spending so much time online in the evenings or working on my laptop anyway (website stuff etc) that I may as well journal online too!

It's weird - it gets to around 10pm in the evening and if I haven't blogged/journalled that day then my fingers just feel itchy! It's like the dream where you realise you are nekkid in public ... it just aint right! I even find myself mentally noting things that happen during the day and thinking "I'll blog about that later!"

Is there a support group for blogaholics? An online one preferably! LOL

Today in general? Not so bad! I finished the re-vamp of the wholesale website ... so fingers crossed that will bring in some nice extra business for me. Also, now the site is finished, I plan on sending out an (unspam) mailing to selected online companies with a special offer on any wholesale orders placed before the end of May ... again fingers crossed!

It's the same all over though ... I don't think it really matters what business you are in ... the economy is shite at the moment. FFS the banks won't even lend to each other at the moment, first time buyers have no hope of getting a mortgage .... what hope does a lil candlemaker have of staying in business?

I hate Mondays - banish them FOREVER! (Major vent)

Everybody hates them so they just shouldn't exist! I know very few people who actually look forward to Monday mornings! I mean I'm sure there are the few who break the rule ... like people who don't ever have to work on Monday mornings and who get to sleep in and ignore the rest of the world until at least Tuesday.

Today has officially been the crappiest Monday that I've had in a long time.

Does anyone even care why? Pffffftttt doesn't even matter because I am going to whine about it anyway (talking about wine ... now where's my glass...)

I am depressed about money. I sometimes feel that I am sinking faster than I can swim and that scares the crap outta me. The business is short of "cash flow" and although orders are coming in ... so are the bills! The household is short of money because I am not taking any drawings from the business at the moment either.

It's not completely dire - well, not yet anyway.. but something has to change soon and I mean SOON or I'm gonna sink, I can feel it. I've even been thinking about trying an evening job again to make some extra cash..... but my skills are worth so much more than just minimum wage!

So yeah... as well as the melancholy, stressed, worried and generally pissed off attitude that I had already developed by late this afternoon, you gotta add in the fact that I am completely out of wax and my delivery now doesn't arrive until tomorrow. All I can say is that it had better show up tomorrow or heads are gonna roll! What good is a candlemaker who has no wax?

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! LOL this photo is from a few months back (pre-fringe!) when I was stressed and turned the camera on myself ... but it just sums up how I have been feeling today!!! The title of the photo is "I am WOMAN, hear me ROAR!"

Thank f**k I am a smoker who has had a glass or four of wine and some chilled out music playing in the background! I may just make it to Tuesday after all ....

Certainly the most interesting Monday in a while!!

My day started off with me almost having a heart attack! I'd used my card in the hole in the wall of my local bank, and then gone straight into the branch to pay in a cheque. I hadn't realised that although I'd put my number in, requested the money and taken my card ... I hadn't actually taken the cash. A lady came in with my money in her hand while I was queuing up and said "I think you left this in the machine."

I actually picked the lady up and hugged her. I wish I could have thought more at the time to at least ask this lady her name - and I was so in shock that I doubt I would recognise her even if I saw her again.

I was gobsmacked - truly and completely (it doesn't happen often that I am so stuck for words!!!) but I was so surprised that it was returned to me safely. Funny ... the cashier saw it all happen and she said to me that someone was looking out for me that day! I was actually physically shaking because the household is pretty short of cash right now. That was literally all I had ... and I told her that I felt the need to go find someone to do a good turn for to pay it forward!! She said no... she said when things like that happen to good people it is because they deserve it.

That's a nice thought huh ... considering how STRESSED I have been lately and how much I do for other people that there has actually been some good karma repaid to me.

I've had a really weird day as a result, but it's got to 9pm and I have a smile on my face so that's gotta be good ... right? LOL Plus, my migraine has been "better" - not gone completely but better ... and my toothache is calming down too! Thank goodness for prescription drugs huh!!